Friday, July 9, 2010

Wow!

I did it! I managed to run for 25 minutes without stopping! It wasn't easy though. I had to keep trying to find my focus and convince myself to keep running. I started getting anxious about it, that happens sometimes, where i get a tight feeling in my chest and feel like crying! It's the craziest feeling!

So, you would think i would be over the moon about accomplishing this. And i am proud of myself, but then something overshadowed it, which in retrospect is completely ridiculous. I looked at how far i ran in 25 minutes, and i only ran 1.68 miles. It completely deflated me. I realize i run on the slow side, i'm a beginner. And my plan is to start increasing my speed once i can run for 30 minutes straight. I only run at a 4.0 on the treadmill. But i seriously thought i was running farther than that. My goal is to run a 5k at the beginning of October, and i'll have to practically double what i'm doing now to run the whole thing!

Is this normal? What i mean is, i should be so happy at what i've accomplished so far, and take each small victory as they come. But instead, i get happy for a milisecond and then beat myself up for not doing better. I guess i want to know if other people react like this. Is this a normal part of trying to better your life and get fit?

I just hope that i get to the point in my life where i can honestly accept and be happy about the small things, and let all the other baggage go.

S :-)

4 comments:

  1. Oh Sandy, first of all (big hugs) and then well done you on your first 25min run!!!
    I could have written your post about 3 months ago, you have said it just how I felt it at the time.
    It was SO hard for me to do the C25K and every session I doubted I could do it, but I did. I started off running at 8kph (almost 5mph) but quickly learned that to be able to increase my time I had to slow down. I ended up doing most of the C25K at 7.3kph (just under 4.5mph) just so I could get through it. I can't remember how far in distance I could go in 30mins then I finished the programme, but it was nowhere near the 5k and I was really upset with myself about that. Then I realised, look how far I'd come from January when I first started running and could only manage 3 x 1min runs before I thought I was going to die.
    So I've stuck with it, kept doing those runs, on the treadmill and outdoors. At first I built up my time by adding a couple more minutes each week til I could run for long enough to complete the full 5k. Then once I got to that point I started adding a tiny bit of speed each week. Now I'm back up to the 8kph/5mph I started at and can even run faster than that for short periods. I still get frustrated when I see girls on other treadmills in the gym running so much faster than me even after I worked up to this, but I keep telling myself again and again that I couldn't run at all 6 months ago, and last week I just did my first 5k race and ran the whole way.
    It seems like we are both way too hard on ourselves and need to start celebrating out achievements and remembering how far we've come.
    You have done SO well to get to this point, and if you keep pushing you'll get to running 5k, and then work on your speed, but for now be proud, YOU RAN FOR 25MINS NON-STOP!!!

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  2. I can't run for 5 minutes! SO BIG CHEERS FOR YOU on the 25 min! WOW! :) That is a HUGE ACCOMPLISHMENT! WHOOHOOO!

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  3. A BIG thanks to both of you! It's amazing how great it feels to have people supporting me and giving me the encouragement and wonderful words of wisdom! Hugs!

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  4. I have the worlds shortest legs so I try not to think about the distance as much other than to improve it even a fraction of a second each time. You should be so proud!!!

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